being sober

I am an alcoholic. I have been sober for 17 years and I’d say that I’m pretty happy about that. I have never thought to write about it until now. I am not going to share any details of my story only a few insights into being me.

Sometimes I wonder what people think about me when I tell them “I’m an alcoholic”. Do they think perhaps that I’m judging their alcohol consumption.. That answer is absolutely not. Do they think there is something wrong with me as “does that girl ever have any fun and let loose?” Well, no problem there. Do folks wonder if it’s ok to drink around me? I say, “drink up” ‘cause it doesn’t bother me. I even keep a few beers or a bottle of wine in the house in case I have a guest.

I am an alcoholic. I am one of the lucky ones who made their way to AA. That support group was a big help to me. I remember at my very first meeting I was surprised to see such a healthy group of people. No kidding. AA is packed full of heathy people because those who are there can’t afford to stuff their feelings or not deal with daily issues. People may come in at a low place, maybe even be rock bottom. I sure was. But, I showed up. I mustered up the courage and took the fork in the road.

Anyway, I don’t feel broken. I do think that my brain may be wired a little different than so-called normal people. I do what I need to do to be healthy. I lead a joyful life and I share myself with others.